The Pleasure Principle

The Pleasure Principle

Why is it so difficult to relax into pleasure some times?  What keeps our mind spinning and us unable to tune in with bodily sensations?  Sometimes it flows and you find yourself so present in the moment and enjoying every sensation. Other times it feels like an invisible block.


This happens to all of us, some more frequently than others.  I believe from my own experiences and that of hundreds of women I have talked with that the underlying root issue lies within pleasure.


The pleasure principle is that to have ease with pleasure, we have to invite pleasure in more frequently.  She doesn’t want to be an uninvited guest, or feel like a third wheel.


In order to bring pleasure in, we may have to add her to our calendars.  But, if you pencil her in, you betta show up! She doesn’t like to be dismissed.


But, why is it so hard to make time for her?  This modern world is stripping something that is essential to the core of our well-being, our vitality, and happiness.  Time for play, time to be in the moment, time to experience the pure awe of being alive.

I’ve made it my mission to learn how to dance with pleasure so intimately and teach others to do so.  Why?  Because it is fundamental to healing any physical or emotional blocks, illness, depression, anxiety, overwhelm, stress.


And, because it a journey that is constantly evolving for me. There was a time in my life I felt so mis-aligned with my path, so out of touch with my inner strength and power that I sought help from a therapist and used anti-depressants.


I now can look back on that time in my life and see I was missing my dates with pleasure.  I am a driven woman—and it is easy for me to get so wrapped up in what I am striving for that I forget to breathe and enjoy.


As we are often called to teach what in essence the hardest lessons were for ourselves, we then become the mentors.  We become the guides to show others along the path that we have so painstakingly had to find.  We make it easier for those who would like to travel the path to do so with direction, ease, and a hand to hold.


I will be unfolding more about tapping into pleasure in the weeks to come. This is my life’s work.  This is my calling.


This week, I’d like you to do an inventory of pleasure in your life.  How often do you invite her in?  In what forms does she show up for you?  When does she slip in and you realize you are smiling, you feel at ease, and a lightness enters your body/mind/spirit.  If you are feeling disconnected from her, then just start journaling about what lights you up.  A good orgasm?  A bath with candles?  A great erotica book?


Remember, there is no agenda with pleasure. This is a deep dive into accomplishing nothing.  It is in fact when we LET GO OF THE DOING that she arrives.

Would you like to dive deeper into your pleasure potential?? Check out my course that is starting soon…click here–>THE VITAL WOMAN PROGRAM

With much love,

Taoist Breast Massage for increased vitality, breast health and sexual wellness

Taoist Breast Massage for increased vitality, breast health and sexual wellness

I’ve recently incorporated a practice into my life that I think you should consider adopting as well! Regular breast massage, an ancient Taoist tradition, can be a wonderful addition to your overall vitality, breast health and sexual wellness!

Stimulating the lymphatic tissue around our breasts can prevent stagnation and encourage fresh blood flow to the area. In the Taoist tradition regular massage of the breasts and surrounding tissues is recommended for preventing Chi and physical debris from accumulating in the lymph, thus preventing disease, cysts and lumps.

Moving the lymph is key for healthy circulation everywhere, but especially with our breasts. We have a plethora of lymph nodes, or collection areas in the area of the armpit and around the collarbone. Lymph contains white blood cells and continuously cleans and filters the tissues around the breast.


This massage practice is also done to stimulate hormonal production and is one of the first steps in cultivating sexual energy. It is often done as preparation before Yoni Egg practices (more on that coming soon!).  

It is simple, and quick practice you can bring into your daily life.  In fact, right in the shower is an awesome time to perform it. Treat yourself to an essential oil infused natural soap and breathe in the essence of the scents while tuning in with the feeling of your hands slipping over your breast tissue.

This practice is so empowering! It helps us to get in tune with our sexuality–and body wisdom.  This 3 minute practice can start changing how your relate to your body, your core vitality, and your breasts.


Breasts are amazing.  They are able to transform fluids into the perfect food for babies. They not only nurture our babes, they are connected to our entire pleasure network.  Honor them, nourish them.  In many traditional cultures, it is believed energy can be transmitted through the breasts.


I was privileged to learn about the energetics of the breasts from Rocio Alcaro, an Ecuadorian ethnobotanist and healer. Rocio educated us about her work with plant medicine and the energy women store in their breasts, including negativity, anger, and suffering to name a few. She also told us that not only can we store this energy in our breasts, but we can absorb negative energy through our breasts as well, almost as if it is a magnetic point in our body.


We as women need to work with moving the energy in our breasts.  There is much toxicity in our world, and we as women, are especially vulnerable to this.  However, there is so much power within us to create, transform, and begin anew.  LET’s start with our breasts, shall we?


This simple but profound massage stimulates the nerves of the nipples and breasts. It can release powerful hormones such as oxytocin and dopamine.

It has also been noted that regular practice can both increase both fullness and buoyancy of the breasts by strengthening suspensory ligaments and muscles.  


Use herbal infused oils or herbal creams to enhance the health benefits of your breast massage. Good old olive oil or coconut oil is fine as well.

I found a lovely breast massage cream by Herbal Revolution called “For the Love of Breast” this summer and it makes me want to douse myself in its heavenly scent. The texture is perfect and it is infused with such as chickweed, plantain, dandelion, lady’s mantle and other breast and lymphatic plant allies.




You can perform this seated as described below (this is the traditional instruction). However, our lives are very full as modern women–feel free to do in the shower while standing as well for regularity of practice.

Seated:  Sit on the floor or with a cushion below your bottom in a cross-legged position.  One heel rests against the opening of the vagina, with a gentle pressure on the clitoris.  The other foot rests next to the shin. You can use something between the heel and vagina if it is difficult to move your legs into this position.

Warm your hands by rubbing them vigorously together to gather Chi (energy).

Lightly rub in upward and outward circles. The hands travel together up the inside of the breasts toward the face, then outwards, downwards, inwards, and upwards again, circling the outsides of the breasts. Lightly move your hands over the breasts in a skimming movement.

It is recommended to do this movement for 36 repetitions.  Then repeat for 36 times, moving in the opposite direction.

Tune in with the sensations generated.  Connect with your breath.


It is recommended you practice this daily, or at least several times weekly for maximum beneficial effects! Enjoy!!

With love,



Aligning with a Feminine Flow

Aligning with a Feminine Flow

his past week I’ve returned to a more part-time schedule with my medical practice work. I commute an hour each way to this integrative practice. They are full days, seeing patients and answering phone calls and emails.  I wake up early and return home later than I’d like.

This past Friday, I started the day with a more feminine flow. I was scheduled to do a bodywork session mid-afternoon, but that needed to be rescheduled by my client. I felt a free-ness Thursday evening knowing I could create my Friday in the way that my body/mind/spirit needed.


My husband has resigned from his teaching position and is now working from home pursuing his creative work endeavors. My 2 children, ages 7 & 9 are home and not currently in any camps.  The day together had the open-ness that is rare in today’s world.

I have had lots of creative juices running through me, and I was psyched to have the day to “work” on my business. To write, create, rest, play, or whatever came around.

Aligning with a feminine flow doesn’t negate structure, but allows you to feel into your own flow. Do you feel the desire to sleep a bit later, write like crazy (that’s what I did!), rest in the middle of the day, have a mid-day romp in the sheets (not super possible with kiddos home, but during the school year—yes!).

My husband and I have been working in the creative flow together, supporting each other, learning and sharing information or tools we gather to further our businesses.

How do we align with a feminine flow when we’re in the grind of work, commuting, family, activities?

What I’ve done is really connected with my inner feminine wisdom of what balance looks like for me. I slowly felt myself tipping over into imbalance when I was working 5 days a week in the last few months, and commuting 10 hours a week. I felt a shift of my hormones, my happiness and my desire to create.

Perhaps you feel a shift as well? What is your tipping point? When do you feel your irritability increasing, your gratitude and ability to stay in a positive mood beginning to wane?

This may be your light on the dashboard of your inner feminine wisdom that change needs to happen. Many of the structures our culture (at least here in the U.S.) that have been put into place mirror a masculine flow.  Work harder, longer, more intensely and you’ll be rewarded. That is the prevalent paradigm.  I don’t see this working for many women, or men.

We as women, have the dual polarities of the feminine and masculine within us.  The ancient traditions that valued the feminine, and acknowledged these polarities taught us that to be fully balanced, we have to connect with both of these aspects within us.

In the last 2 years I’ve done a ton of connecting further with my masculine. The powerful negotiator, protector, fierce strong side of myself.  I’ve also done lots of journeying with the deeper part of my feminine.  I’m still growing, evolving, and hope to always to continue to do so.

For me, finding my way back to balance meant earning less for my family on the 1 day a week I choose to not work at the medical practice. However, I honor, as does my husband, that balance is the most crucial to a happy, fulfilled life.

What does a day that aligned with the feminine flow look like for you? Does it light you up and make you feel connected with yourself, those you love, your creative side, and your fun-loving self? 

I invite you to dance with this idea and if there is a way you can change your life, whether in a drastic, or a subtle way, to be more in YOUR alignment of feminine flow, do it! Fight for it!

P.S. Aligning with your Feminine Flow is a Key Element to awakening your sexuality, sensuality and a passionate life! More of this to come in upcoming blog posts and we’ll dive deep into it in my upcoming VITAL WOMAN PROGRAM