I was at a point a few years ago where I felt totally out of touch with my true desires and pleasure. I didn’t feel like I had the time and I had lost touch with this part of myself.
Between work, being a mama, and all the responsibilities that held, I didn’t know how to connect with myself the way I used to be able to. And, this affected everything…my mood, my body, the choices I made, literally everything.
What happened to change it all? I learned specific practices and techniques to connect deeper to pleasure and to putting my self-care and self-love first. Gasp! First!! How selfish! Or maybe you’re thinking, “that’s great for you, but I can’t do that, there are too many people depending on me, too many things to do!”
If you are thinking either of those 2 things, then I challenge you to read on, because tapping in with pleasure and desire are EXACTLY what you need to manage all those hats, and keep all the balls in the air, with more ease and joy.
Now, my life is filled with tapping in with my body, my desires, my pleasure on a daily basis. And you know what, the world did not stop, the dinner still gets on the table, the kids are still taken care of. In fact, all of this is done with more ease, more attentiveness, more pleasure. Really. And sex? Well, let me just say it is a lot more juicy, spontaneous, and my desire is higher than ever.
The first step in getting in touch with desire and pleasure is to identify what your desires are and speaking them out loud, and writing them down.
When we desire to tap into pleasure or just to amplify our desire, we first have to identify what would give us pleasure and what help us tap into our desires.
Here’s an exercise for you:
Write down what’s in your way right now? What are the obstacles to you tapping in or receiving your desires?
What has kept you cycling in a pattern that isn’t serving you?
Is it lack of perceived time for yourself
Not asking for help
Taking on too many responsibilities
Distraction—using your precious energy to watch TV programs that help you zone out
Now take some deep breaths in and out slowly, and put your hands on your heart;
Ask yourself how you would FEEL, what are the sensations, if these things were not in your way?
Continue breathing until you can feel into your heart (use your “mind’s eye”) and see what your desires are—they are layered underneath all the “stuff”, the “shoulds,”, the “guilt”, and the barriers. Feel into the SENSATIONS that arise.
Continue your breathing as you tap in with these desires, and really feel them move in your body. Your breathing may change, your sensations may shift.
Imagine light streaming into your heart center, or whatever feels right to you.
Take a moment after this exercise to reflect on what came up.
Write these desires/images/wisdom down in the present using “I AM” For example: I AM….abundant in my life’s work. I AM…full of sexual desire for my partner. I AM so comfortable with my body.
At first these may feel false when you start to write them down. This is resistance. Go through it.
Then, be truly brave, and speak these desires outloud. YES!! OUT LOUD.
This is how you change what resides in your body.
Hit reply to this email and let me know if you did the exercise, what did you discover or if you got stuck with any part! I’d love to hear from you!
I have noticed the pull of the moon’s energy on me since my late teens and early 20’s. This is when I first starting studying women’s health and spirituality.
Women have had these collective experiences around the moon for centuries, but moon wisdom is becoming lost in the modern world.
Full moons have always had a profound effect on me. I notice an even further awakening of my feminine energy, sexual power, and connection with spirit. I used to joke with my girlfriends in college—“watch out!” if we were going out on a full moon night. Meaning watch out what you attract and draw in, because the sexual energy was so potent.
Then, as a midwife, and a nurse on a labor and delivery hospital unit, I certainly saw the direct relationship between the full moon and babies being born. It’s not a joke—babies definitely chose to be born more often on full moons. When I would look up at the sky on full moon time, I’d say, I’m about to get really busy!
The moon cycles can mirror our own cycles as women. When my moon cycle is on sync with the moon cycle, I personally feel more aligned. When they match up for me, I know I am on the right path. This happened for me this month. Just as the full moon is pulling in, my bleeding begins slightly, and will flow with the full moon rising.
Full moons are about letting go of what is no longer serving us. It is a time of extreme creativity, power, and amplification. It is about purging and letting go of old stories that are weighing us down. That is why I honor the moon time around the full moon cycle. Our moon time (our menstrual bleeding) is a time of purification and releasing.
What feels like it is no longer serving you. What stories, what limiting beliefs, what past creations, ways of being, people, and paths are no longer aligned?
Here is a way to tap in with this full moon energy and release so you can make space for the new at the FULL MOON time:
If possible, stand outside in a place where you can see the full moon (or do inside in a comfortable space)
Begin to breathe slowly, deepening your exhale with each breath
Imagine white light coming down from the crown of your head and then flowing through the rest of your body down into the Earth. Visualize this cycle for several breaths.
Imagine red light coming up from the depths of the earth, traveling up through your feet and legs and then to your pelvis and womb. Let the red light cleanse and collect any stored energy.
Place one hand on your lower belly, the other on your heart center.
Continue to cycle the white light through your body and the red light in your pelvis, circling.
Tune in with your heart. What do you ache to let go of. What do you feel limited by? What is holding you back?
Send whatever you are ready to let go of down from your heart, into you’re the circulating heat in your lower belly.
Let this red light spiral down your legs and back down to the depths of the earth.
Let her recycle this energy.
Continue to draw down the white light from the moon into your body. Visualize it clearing out anything that you still haven’t let go of. Circle this white light throughout your body.
End the visualization by putting your hands over your heart or up to the sky and give thanks. Give thanks for the ability to let go, to release, and therefore to grow.